"I’m still alive but I’m barely breathing."
But since no one pushed me to get on this road and this is a personal choice, let’s bring it on! (at Pamantasan ng Lungsod ng Maynila)
Zero Degree’s Bubblegum Ice Cream Cupcake. I think I became a unicorn after eating this.🍦🍧😍 Wishing you guys a sweet week ahead! (at Zero Degree Manila Ice Bar)
“Good decisions come from experience but experience comes from bad decisions.”
There is no specific way on how I decide. Funny how that statement is very indecisive. There are those moments where I already know in my heart the answer while there are times when it takes forever for me to make a judgment call. In general, let me point out with downright confidence that I have the worst decision-making skills in the world. For example, the correct answer to a multiple choice question is either a B or a C but then I answered D. That always happens! Just kidding, but seriously I am always what you call, ‘torn’. Be the decision a grave one like applying for a certain school or as shallow as choosing a nail polish color. I could probably pass up for a patient with a lesion in his prefrontal cortex. Well not really, but you get the idea. Whenever there is something to decide upon it always takes me a long time before I make a decision. The moments I mentioned earlier where I already know in my heart the answer, they rarely happen and so I follow an algorithm for when I have something to decide upon.
For simple matters like choosing what to wear, I consider a lot of things before actually finalizing what I will be wearing that day. Factors like the practicality of wearing such with regards to the weather, the mode of transportation that I will be employing, the activities of that day, and of course, aesthetics. It will usually take me three outfit changes and a jungle-kind-of-room before I decide. That is one of the things I take into consideration when deciding, practicality.
Now for a deeper example, let us say I am choosing my career path. In this case, if I will be pursuing medicine or not. I believe that I was born to pursue the arts, but I was raised honing the left hemisphere of my brain due to my competency in numbers and the sciences. My true passions are writing, painting, the languages, and geography but I am equally capable of being a scientific person as shown from my academic performance. With this in mind, my parents made me see how pursuing the medical field is more practical in the long run than the easy fulfillment my heart will receive if I stick to the arts. People say that young girls are small replicas of their mothers and this I can attest to as I am greatly influenced by my mother. Her words are always in my mind and my actions are always a reflection of my upbringing. Pursuing medicine takes on an arduous journey but many have attested that its fruit in the long run will be worth it.
I guess I will always be that kind-of-person, the one who chooses to delay her satisfaction for when it is accumulated it is bigger and more satisfying. You can say that I am pretty futuristic. Well, I was raised to be like one. Basically, when I decide I think of the consequences not only during the present time but also in the long run. I am also a very ‘money-oriented’ person where every decision is weighed by the capital and outcome, not necessarily monetary-wise. Aside from all these, I think of my happiness. I guess that is what is important, that your decision will make you happy. Well not necessarily at the moment but it can take some time. Many people regret decisions that they made and that is one thing I do not want to experience, to regret. I will be a hypocrite if I say I don’t have any regrets but of course I am trying my very best to stop committing the same mistakes. There are chances that I might have passed upon because of a wrong decision but what can I do? I just have to accept the fact and move on.
Arriving at a decision is no easy chore. Perhaps for some people it is not complicated, but for most of us I believe it takes a lot of effort to do. There are just some points that I have to personally remember. First is to employ the mind and not the heart. One must never make a permanent decision on a temporary emotion. Another is to ask every time if it is truly worth it? Not just at the moment but up until the end. Also, remember that there is such a thing as intuition and it is real. Sometimes if we could not possibly make up our minds, it is best to lean towards our gut feel.
After all is said and done, know that the universe has no fixed agenda. Once you make any decision, it works around that decision. There is no right or wrong, only a series of possibilities that shift with each thought, feeling, and action that you experience. And if ever the decision you made is somehow not the right one, spend your time not dwelling on how you made the wrong choice but instead correct it.